Are Your Words CONGRUENT with Your Body??

Experts say nonverbal communication have more influence than spoken words.

Studies have found Communications is divided into 3 groups:

• Body language accounts for 55% of all given communication,
• Paralanguage accounts for 38% (which includes: sighs, pauses and intonation)
• Verbal communication provides a mere 7% of the emphasis (actual words) .

Below are a list of some positive and negative forms of communication...see if you can see you're own response in any of these?

Positive Body Language

1. Strong, firm handshake conveys ~ Confidence and Secure Self-Esteem
2. Eye contact conveys ~ Openness with Honesty
3. Leaning forward with eye contact & hand gestures conveys ~ Sincerity, Confidence, Inquisitiveness.
4. Nodding conveys ~ Your Approval
5. Natural tone, volume, pitch and pace of voice conveys ~ Security with Confidence
6. Hands behind your head with feet on desk conveys ~Confidence or Authority
7. Relaxed upright posture with arms swinging naturally while walking conveys ~ Confidence!
8. Varying facial expressions to match what is being said i.e., smiling when being friendly or serious when being firm, etc. conveys ~ Openness with Secure Self-esteem!

Negative Body Language

1. Leaning back and looking down conveys ~ Lack of confidence, Unapproachable
2. Limp, weak handshake conveys ~ Nervousness
3. Leaning in too close conveys ~ being threatening
4. Weak, soft voice conveys ~ Nervousness
5. Clearing throat, saying "um", "uh," conveys ~ Insecurity with nervousness
6. Dropping head and looking down conveys ~ non-trustworthiness
7. Staring at the other person during silences causes ~ Increased Tension
8. Maintaining eye contact too long (over 7-10 seconds) causes ~ Anxiety or Discomfort
9. Rigid, stooped posture, feet shuffling conveys ~ Lack of Confidence
10. Folded arms, crossed legs, picking lint off clothing conveys ~ Disagreement or lack of interest.
11. Touching your Face conveys ~ Nervousness or Dishonesty
12. Drumming finger or twiddling thumbs conveys ~ Anxiety or not paying Attention
13. Clenching/wringing hands, playing with jewelry conveys ~ Anxiety, Stress and Nervousness
14. Rubbing the back of neck or the hair conveys ~ Frustration
15. Sitting on the edge of chair, jiggling foot all convey ~ Anxiety Stress and Nervousness.

Beware!! Nonverbal messages can often contradict what you say in words. If a person sends mixed messages or the verbal messages are not congruent with the body language ~ for the most part, this results in loss of credibility.

Why? Because most Listeners TRUST and RESPOND better to Positive Nonverbal Communication vs. ONLY Positive Verbal Communication. It's simply much much louder!

Here's an example: If someone said "I love you" while yelling, frowning, looking miserable, their arms folded across their chest and they are standing partially turned away from you.

Would you feel their love? NO WAY...Because the non verbal communication together with the tonality of yelling is not congruent with the 'words' being expressed. And guess what? Those words 'I love you' don't mean much in such a context.

Please post what you learned from this article and what you intend to focus on to improve your non verbal communication today...

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Nada Adams, Success RESULTS Coach, teaches Parent & Entrepreneurs how to live authentically with integrity to create more balance, more health and more wealth! Experience her NO-BS intuitive coaching that's Direct & Straightforward! Definitely NOT focused on what you want to hear. For a LIMITED time ~ schedule your complimentary coaching call today by visiting: www.vipresultscoaching.com.For more resources, sign up for the VIP Weekly Connection letter.

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